Well hey there strangers! It's been awhile since I've last blogged... But I am super excited about this post! It's 3 AM so I'm just going to apologize ahead of time if things get a little crazy. It's late, okay? So, these last few months have been nothing short of a crazy beautiful journey with some hiccups along the way. But hey, I'm alive, it's spring, and I am almost done with my sophomore year of college. Not too shabby if you ask me. As I've been growing and diving deeper into my faith, God has really put it on my heart to share a little bit about where I've been, where I am, and where I want to be. Soooo, basically I'm going to be sharing with you some of the ways God has been growing me and infiltrating into my life these last few months, in hopes that maybe some people (maybe you're the lucky guy/gal) out there reading this blog can relate, find comfort, hope, etc. Here we go.. Are you ready?
- So what about these hiccups I speak of? HA, well I can honestly say that I've been thrown some curve balls over the last few months and I've learned that you can't wear a catcher's mit on both hands while going through this thing called life... You've got to be able to throw something back when life hits you! I used to wonder what it was that I was doing wrong when I'd find myself stuck in an extreme low or being knocked down, time after time, not being able to catch my breath. But honestly, over the course of weeks, I've learned that my mindset was so so wrong. If you are struggling and being thrown curve balls, one after another, take it as a compliment. No, I'm not crazy. I'm serious. God must see some serious strength and persistence in you. He gives His toughest battles to His strongest soldiers. Believe that. About a month or two ago, I read through the book of Job in the Bible. To sum up the book of Job, Job was a very righteous and prosperous man. Because Job is greatly blessed with wealth, family, possessions, stature, and more, Satan believed that if God were to take away all of these blessings, Job would surely curse God. In response, God gives Satan permission to test Job's righteousness. Job had everything taken away from him... From his family to his possessions to being harmed physically. Job was told to hate God for what was being done to him, but refused every time. Instead, Job continued to stay devoted to God, praising Him and desiring Him a midst all that he was going through. My struggles are nothing compared to that described in the book of Job. But without a doubt, there is so much to take away from Job. Don't fall into temptation, don't give way to the enemy when you encounter struggles... Instead, realize that you are being tested and choose to stand firm in your faith. God will redeem the struggles.
- If you've read some of my blogs in the past, you'll know that I went through a break up about 6-7 months ago. I would say within the last 4-5 months, I've been praying so hard for my future husband and for my own heart when it comes to becoming a more Godly woman. I pray that my future husband will have that of the inspiration of Paul, a heart like David's heart for God, the ability to lead like Moses lead, the integrity of a man like Joseph, and that his love for me will remind me of the unconditional and unfathomable love of Christ. May sound like my standards are pretty high, huh? Maybe. But as a child of God, my standards SHOULD be that high. Girls, if you think your standards are too high, they are probably right where they should be. God has put an absolutely amazing man in my life and he exceeds my standards by far. While it may take some time for God to answer a prayer like this, it is so worth the wait. I am so extremely blessed to have a man in my life that can lead me spiritually and push me to be a more Godly woman. God gave me more than what my heart even knew it truly desired. My point is, set those standards wayyy up there. The right guy, a guy on fire for God, will exceed those standards that you feel are too high.
- So I talked about wanting to be a Godly woman.. What does that means? It means drenching yourself in Proverbs 31. Be a Proverbs 31 girl. If you aren't familiar with the reference, look it up! For me, when I ask God to transform my heart and change my ways to be a more Godly woman, I set up Proverbs 31 standards for myself. I pray that when the day comes for me to be married, that not only my husband be ready by God's standards, but that I am the Godly woman that my husband needs me to be. But more recently, on top of focusing on being a Godly woman for my future husband, I've shifted my focus on being a more Godly woman to better suit the role of the Bride of Christ. Sounds silly and backwards, but it's something I've really taken to heart more recently. First and foremost, we as women, should be focusing on representing ourselves in the image of Christ because it's in Him that our identity is found. It's in Christ that our worth, beauty, value, and identity are found. So often, people find their identity in worldly things and are left feeling unworthy, empty, devalued, and unfulfilled. For me personally, I used to find my identity in guys, my friends, family, the sport I played... You name it. I used to feel like finding the right guy could fix everything. I think that's so many girls' perspective. We want a guy to save us. Well guess what, a guy did save you, thousands of years ago on the cross. Don't make false idols and put trust in worldly desires... They will always fail you. Instead, put trust where trust is deserved. Put your trust in God. We should desire to be Godly women because it's what God has called us to be.
- Lately, I've had to make a few rather big decisions concerning my future in regards to what is in my best interest versus what might be the easier path. Often times, I don't even like making small decisions, so you can imagine I've struggled pretty hard in making these bigger decisions. I've struggled with the matter of time and not knowing where my heart will be in the next year, the fact that I felt like I was making decisions without having enough time to truly decide what it was God was calling me to do, etc. It all came down to the feeling of not having enough time. But I realized (honestly within the last two days) that I serve the Author of time. God has the ability to pause, fast forward and rewind... So why am I so worried? Everything happens on God's time. Regardless of choosing between one righteous path and another, God is going to use our decisions to glorify Him if it's in Him that we stay devoted. My decisions can serve Him if I go into it with the right intentions. So, do not get weighted down when you feel confused about which path to choose. Pray about it and live for Christ. The rest will work itself out. God has plans to prosper you (Jeremiah 29:11).
- Have you ever gone to someone with a problem that you are having and they respond by saying... "Wow, I wish there was more that I could do, but I feel like all I can do is pray about it." Have you ever been in that situation? I am astounded when I hear responses like that. If anything has been revealed to me over the last year or so it's this... Prayer is such a powerful tool. PRAYER IS POWERFUL. When people say, "Sorry that all I can do is just pray for you," I want to shake them! Haha, are you kidding me? JUST pray for me? That's the best thing you can do for someone!! No one can be your God and vice versa. God asks that we pray without ceasing (1 Thessalonians 5:17). How flippin cool is that?? He never gets tired of hearing us... So go to Him! I feel like God has really given me a testimony of prayer and I am so blessed to be able to share that with people. God has answered so many prayers for me these last few months and I will never take credit for all the good in my life right because to Him be all the glory. Gosh, I cannot emphasize enough the importance of prayer!
Andddd it's now 4 AM. On that note, I leave you with this idea... God has truly moved in my life over the span of my sophomore year of college and it wasn't until I surrendered my life to Him that I truly knew what it meant to love, to feel joy, to have purpose. We have so many hang ups... We are hung up on not being able to forgive, trying to figure out why, why us... Let go of those hang ups. Instead, be hung up on Christ. Christ was hung up on the cross for us. In return, can you let God in? Can you sign the consent to go under God's knife?
